Now every girl is expected to have: Caucasian blue eyes, full Spanish lips, a classic button nose, hairless Asian skin with a California tan, a Jamaican dance hall ass, long Swedish legs, small Japanese feet, the abs of a lesbian gym owner, the hips of a nine-year-old boy, the arms of Michelle Obama, and doll tits. The person closest to actually achieving this look is Kim Kardashian, who, as we know, was made by Russian scientists to sabotage our athletes.

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Just say yes and you'll figure it out afterwards.

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Do your thing and don't care if they like it.

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Don't waste your energy trying to educate or change opinions... Do your thing and don't care if they like it.

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Sometimes if you have a difficult decisin to make, just stall until the answer presents itself.

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You can’t be that kid standing at the top of the waterslide, overthinking it. You have to go down the chute.

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Photoshop is just like makeup. When it’s done well it looks great, and when it’s overdone you look like a crazy asshole.

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Why are my arms so weak? It's like I did that push-up last year for nothing!

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Whatever the problem, be part of the solution. Don’t just sit around raising questions and pointing out obstacles.

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Everybody kind of gets to be the person they didn't get to be.

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